Hubby Didn’t Get a Promotion (…did the world end?)

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Planes torpedoed down from the once untarnished crystal blue skies.


This now unholy planet shattered open and began oozing out the same crimson blood I held in my veins.


Suddenly, as if ‘A Clockwork Orange’ was teasing this bleak reality, you also hear the echoes of the masses whispering atrocities…”Costco stopped selling their polish dogs.”


Forever. Gone.


And I knew, I knew…my childhood ended that day.


Annnnd all this because my no good, dirty rotten husbandit couldn’t land a promotion at work so I can take all that cash to buy a diamond-crusted Chanel bag for myself. >:(









No, I love my honey hippoHere’s the boring (real) story:


[Hippo comes home and greets me prepping dinner with a smooch 💏]


“I had a private discussion with my manager today.”


These meetings occur once a month and the objective is to touch base on progress at work.


“Oh yeah? How did it go?”


(For newer readers that don’t know, my husband works in Big Tech.)


“Ehh same but he gave me a choice.”


It seems his work performance *converted to grade school letters anyone can understand* is basically a C right now.


It’s not exactly a surprise.


GUYS REMEMBER THE TIME HE THREW HIS PHONE AT ME OMG. I could gut him right now in his sleep just remembering it!!!


Hubby has not been feeling his work projects for a while now. His work gets done but it’s slow, tedious, and stressful for him. It’s not something he’s naturally good at – because it requires lots of back and forth.


He likes working alone on neverending, complicated puzzles (and yup, he’s abnormally quick at them) but he hates the other stuff that comes with the engineering role.


During the meeting, his manager gave him two options…


A) Improve his current work performance and stay on the track originally expected of him with a promotion check every 2-3 years.




B) Play to his natural strength and Mr. Manager will sniff out a specialized project he can go to town on alone. His type of puzzle solving talent at his job level definitely has an appeal. The job is safe. But…very grimly, his manager warned him that doing this means little to no clear path for traditional advancement.


“And that’s what manager said. He told me to choose.”


We both stare at each other super seriouslythen busted out laughing together at the same time.

Hubby with his orange creamsicle and pastel nail colors he chose.


“Wait, how is that even hard???”


“I know right.”




“Yes, I told him I’m interested in B at the moment.”


“You should have screamed it at him. Why did it take him over 1 year to see that!”


“He made the no-promotion thing sound like the end of the worl–”


I interjected – “and like, who cares?!”


“Exactly :)”


“Why would anyone choose to stay on A if they don’t enjoy the basic principles of work? Screw promotions. Plus if your performance sucks (reflected by missing passion) then there’s not going to be advancement anyway.”


“I guess because he took the traditional path, he automatically believed it would be an ego blow doing anything else.”


“This is terrific news. I hope he finds something for you to switch to your strengths. Promo cut, pay cut, paper cut, who cares. It would be the biggest blessing of my life right now if you started to LOVE your work like I love mine. It’s all I ask!!! You know how I feel about the concept of ‘work.’ I wouldn’t do any of this shit (ie. working on my deep life projects) if I wasn’t naturally drawn to it for fun.”


“I know :)”


“Seriously make it happen – work your manager and find your thing. We have to get over the concept of survivorship and rat race. Something frivolous like a promotion shouldn’t entice people to give into work they’re not interested in. Life is short!!*




He isn’t a big talker so I just replaced his speech with smiley faces. That’s what he was doing the whole time I was ranting anyways.

Related: Raindrop Guilt & Winning the Husband Lottery

Perhaps he was afraid that I was going to tell him to step up to the challenge of (A) or be disappointed he’s only an average performer at work. I could sort of smell his relief when we both agreed on B instantly.

I don’t think I would ever push him to do something he doesn’t want to do. It’s clear that I think the WORLD of my husband in almost EVERY way.

I know he’s incredibly talented when applied to something that suits him – his brain is just wired for certain tasks that 99.5% of people find difficult. It’s up to the people like me (and his manager) to seek out the best environment for his applicable skills.

As long as he’s got something to work on that brings a smile to his face, I’m good with that.

Related: Find Meaning Before You Find Wealth




OK, that’s all for today. I hope you found the morals behind our talk tonight agreeable. You don’t even have to be financially independent to see that right?

What’s the point of climbing up the career ladder if you dislike that ladder? My hubby works for an awesome company but it doesn’t change our plans.

Anything near $300k for most fairly frugal people (without kiddos) means they’re pretty much good and set to make money the second choice. From there, you should start building your own escape ladder.

I know I would rather be happy working for a little longer than miserable and nonchalant working for the years to come just for a promotion!



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